Rococco. While I too have severe, and complex, sleep apnea I cannot fathom managing those other variables you mentioned. In my case, my use of a sleeping aid was the result of a stroke. Thankfully the professionals helping me feel the stroke was caused by my apnea. As a result I am 100% complaint with the use of my machine as I do not wish to relive that experience.
I offer this background for two reasons. The first being severe apnea such as yours could easily be a precursor to a stroke, IMO, and having solid professional advice helping you manage sleep, pain meds, and hay fever is a must, again IMO. Please do not give up rather take it as a challenge to build a way forward that will give you that level of sleep you rightfully expect and desire. Good luck! Dave